I’ve got expectations. Hopes. Fantasies. Standards, you might call them.
They are rarely met.
Usually they are petty little things that bring me down in petty little ways: No surprise snow day despite the fact that I had wished extra hard the night before and had a feeling it was going to snow. Menu items labeled with multiple peppers which don’t hurt to eat. Space shuttle launches that are really far away and then they are cancelled for balmy breezes. Never being a prodigy at any instrument I pick up for the first or even the third time.
This one time I went to the King Richard’s Renaissance Faire with my pals Alison and Rory, and Alison had told me ahead of time that the BIGGEST CAT IN THE WORLD was going to be there. The biggest big cat! A LIGER, and really actually the specific specimen holding the WORLD’S BIGGEST title. I was led to believe I would not believe my eyes.
Oh boy oh boy oh boy!
All the way to the fair(e), the liger prowled before my mind’s eye. As big as a schoolbus! As big as the dragon in The Neverending Story! It was going to be great! (Grrrreat?)
Alas! Alack! Ehue! The thing was merely enormous! Its head was nowhere near the size of a car. I did not have to crane my neck to look at it. I did not realize with mingled horror and delight that the fair was set up ON THE LIGER ITSELF all along. It was 900 pounds, a mere 200 pounds heavier than the world’s biggest Siberian tiger. Psssh. I wanted that Liger to be off the bellcurve. Outlier of outliers!
Anyway, the moral of the story is that things are never as good as they should be!